How can I get essences? Or maybe know how to gender swap? I'm a noob and need some help I made my guy a boy instead of a girl and I want to know how to

You can get essences through Jinxie's Jamboree (the only game on Sylestia at the moment), fighting, nurturing eggs, or through the trade broker. I believe the only way to get a gender swap is to buy it through the trade broker or with diamonds.

I would just like to add that you can also get essences from the diamond shop and mission satchels.

Note: the rarity of the mission does not impact the rarity of the essence you may get. You can get an enhanced essence from a lower rarity satchel and a regular essence from a very hard one. I, sadly, do not know the minimum rarity of mission satchel you can get an essence from but I know you can get them from hard and very hard missions as well as satchels from site-wide raids.