He sighed, guessing it was now or never. Not like there could be any better time to vent. But he knew he probably would regret it. "I know I said I have forgiven you, and trust me I have. But ... that doesn't mean I'm not upset, I still see things when I'm around you...things still flash over in my head. I just still feel this small ... " He held his hands by his chest, looking at them as he moved them to as if he was holding a small sphere. "this small ball of disturbance, of anger, that just claws at me and pulls. It's like a small bomb ready to detonate."
Sslover
Level 61
The Kind-Hearted
Joined: 8/31/2016
Threads: 249
Posts: 74,416
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 5:26 PM
Post #7083
Ash nodded, remaining silent
Fritxyfox
Level 73
Assistant to the Sculptor
Joined: 5/3/2019
Threads: 55
Posts: 31,427
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 5:30 PM
Post #7084
He was at least thankful for that, he felt bad enough and upset enough just saying this. "I feel it a lot of the time, it's there like the pain of my soul. Just there, and there's barely anything I can do about it. It plays over in my head just like all the other upsetting things that has in my head, over and over. I don't know how to fix it, how to get rid of it." His eyes flickered to their flame colors again.
Sslover
Level 61
The Kind-Hearted
Joined: 8/31/2016
Threads: 249
Posts: 74,416
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 5:36 PM
Post #7085
"Then don't."
Fritxyfox
Level 73
Assistant to the Sculptor
Joined: 5/3/2019
Threads: 55
Posts: 31,427
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 5:52 PM
Post #7086
"But I want to! I want to feel fully safe around you, I don't like feeling this anger. I don't want to feel it ... because I'm afraid of it. I'm afraid of Shadow, and of what I would do if I tried hurting you. I know you're strong, and normally I don't stand a chance. But I have horrible abilities, power that increases as Shadow. And I wouldn't want to risk even the slightest chance of being able to harm you. I don't want to hate you, harm you or hurt you."
Sslover
Level 61
The Kind-Hearted
Joined: 8/31/2016
Threads: 249
Posts: 74,416
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 5:59 PM
Post #7087
Ash smiled just a little, and even then it wad a sad one. "Why not? It's okay if you do...because you can't expect time to heal you. Time doesn't heal anything. It just teaches you how to live with it."
Fritxyfox
Level 73
Assistant to the Sculptor
Joined: 5/3/2019
Threads: 55
Posts: 31,427
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 6:02 PM
Post #7088
He looked at Ash, brows furrowing. "Why not? Because I still love you, I don't want to hurt you!" He stopped talking, clearly struggling over himself. For a second, the beginning of a metal rod similar to a spear seemed to flicker into existence for a moment before he shook it away.
Sslover
Level 61
The Kind-Hearted
Joined: 8/31/2016
Threads: 249
Posts: 74,416
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 6:09 PM
Post #7089
"Because...It's okay to be angry at me. In fact, I'm pretty sure I would've thought you insane if you weren't. And even if you did hurt me...well, that would only be fair, wouldn't it?"
Fritxyfox
Level 73
Assistant to the Sculptor
Joined: 5/3/2019
Threads: 55
Posts: 31,427
Posted: 6/21/2020 at 6:19 PM
Post #7090
"Fair or not, I don't want to hurt you. "
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