While surgery will suck, think about the long term.

Yeah. It'll be rough since I'll be unable to bear weight on my leg for 2 months but it's worth it. I can't live like this.

But I've seen five different people for it already, and so far the only one who even looked at my scan longer than 30 seconds or listened to anything I said was a nurse practitioner who couldn't do anything, so... here's hoping someone pays attention this time. Maybe I've deteriorated enough for them to finally care.

Keep me updated please. Hopefully someone does finally care enough to do something.

I will, and let me know if you ever need to talk.

The first doctor said there was nothing visibly wrong with my knees that partially dislocated, but gave me braces that made it worse. The second doctor said the first one took the wrong x-rays and he had no idea why on earth he would have given me the kind of braces he did, so I got different ones which helped a bit. Then they started to make it worse too, and the third doctor's response to "I've been in physical therapy for two or three years and it's not working" was "physical therapy, that's what you need." The fourth said he could see where my kneecaps were partially out of place on my scans, but that there was nothing structurally wrong with my knees.

Then I saw a nurse practitioner for a broken ankle who was amazing and asked him to look at the scans, and he actually looked for a while and said the bones in my legs aren't formed quite right so it's harder for my kneecap to stay in place. He said if it got worse he'd recommend surgery, but I'd need to see a doctor to confirm that. It's much worse and my physical therapists and some of my other doctors agree with him. So now I have to find yet another doctor and I'm not exactly optimistic, but three of my others who are amazing are working together to pick someone, so hopefully they find a good option.

I do wish you the best of luck with it. i know it's probably scary, but if it turns out good, things will be much better.

Thanks, same to you. Weirdly calm about surgery and terrified of the doctor appointment

for me, it's the fear that i may not make it out...

I can't blame you, it's scary. I'll be here for you; us sickly people gotta stick together xD