Granted but now you break the lead every time you write.

I wish to finish my novel.

Granted, but your novel is a complete flop.

I wish to have a boiled egg.

oops

Granted, but it's rotten

I wish for my rats to be able to talk.

Granted. Your rats can now speak human language - but they can't understand it, and they're speaking a different language anyway. You can tell it's gibberish nonsense anyway.

I wish the coronavirus was over.

(oooh feel you)

Granted, human race dies so corona is gone!

I wish for some tape so I can kidnap my enemy.

(sorry for the back-and-forth)

Granted. You receive double-sided tape. You kidnap your enemy, but you also trapped yourself.

I wish for GLaDOS

granted but the next morning the house is full of (i can't spell it so an adaptation) poison gas and you die


i wish to have a pile of pillows that look like rocks in my enemy's house and after a couple months of them having them to replace them with actual rocks of those same sizes in the same positions so after a long day the jump on the boulders thinking they're pillows and break all their bones

Granted, but you are your own enemy so you break your bones.

I wish for Paul Hollywood.